Today’s yogurt was terrifying.
This stuff would probably place at least second in a contest for the most revolting concoction of the 21st century. Grossly acidic in a carbonated-water-but-not way, the marshmallows all confusingly and crunchily soggy.
I ate all of it in the name of learning, but I would have been much happier without. It was even worse than yesterday’s yogurt, and yesterday I thought things couldn’t get worse.
Warning: grossness below.
You remember that time in middle school when you ate something vaguely disagreeable but you couldn’t really tell (heart rate normal, palms dry, gas discreet, stomach cramps nonexistent)? And then you had a swimming unit for PE and the chill of the water slowly seeped through the ring of fat around your tummy and then got all cozy in your gut? And then you had to leave early or risk a really gross and unhygienic public accident that your friends would never let you forget?
That never happened to me. But today I gained a newfound sympathy for all the awkward adolescents who have ever had to experience it.
After the first failed banana-choco trial, I was thinking about a potential future experiment – adding a bit of water to the hot chocolate powder and making a thick syrup to add to the yogurt. But after half a day of mild yogurt-induced suffering, I feel like I won’t be going anywhere near any unfortunate combinations of fermented dairy and chocolate. Maybe if I run out of ideas before the 30 days are up and get really desperate, but I feel like even the prospect of redoing this experiment would be enough motivation to fuel a month’s worth of unrelated yogurt iterations.
Hopefully tomorrow’s will be better.